If You Leave: The Beautifully Broken Series: Book 2 Read online

  No effing way in hell.

  My heart is slamming a million miles an hour in my chest.

  Because it’s Gabriel.

  Chapter Five

  Gabriel

  You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. The universe obviously has a strange sense of humor. After lusting after this girl last night and wondering what happened to her all day today, I’m now standing face-to-face with her? What are the odds of that?

  Pretty fucking small.

  Yet there she is.

  Madison stares at me in shock as she stands next to a guy dressed in fancy jeans and a button-up shirt. The guy is clearly a candy-ass, but he’s not my concern.

  I’m totally fixated on Madison: her wide eyes, her mouth slightly open.

  That’s exactly how I feel. But unlike her, I manage to keep the surprise off my face.

  I’m trying to process the crazy coincidence of us meeting like this, the second meeting in two days, when I see my sister emerge from a back hall, carrying a large tray of drinks. As Jacey glances up at me, everything suddenly clicks together and makes perfect sense.

  Jacey mentioned that she was going to bring a friend with her to the club last night.

  And Jacey has told me about her boss before, a supposedly cool girl who had to grow up way too soon for reasons that I don’t remember right now. What I do remember is that she called her Maddy.

  Maddy is Madison.

  Jacey is the common thread, the root of this unholy coincidence.

  Of course.

  I shake my head and watch while Jacey sets her tray down and bounds across the room to grab me in a bear hug.

  “Gabriel!” she squeals. “It’s about time you got here. I’ve missed your ugly face.”

  I can’t help but hug her back, even though I’m annoyed about the whole Madison thing. I almost feel like Jacey finagled all of this on purpose, but I know that can’t be right. There’s no way she could’ve arranged our meeting behind the club.

  I can feel Madison’s cool stare, but I refuse to look up and meet it because I can’t tell if she’s annoyed or intrigued that I’ve intruded upon her life.

  For the life of me, I can’t remember much after that fucking taxi accident last night. It was a total blackout, the first one I’ve had in months.

  I don’t remember what I said to her, I don’t remember how I acted around her, I can’t remember shit. I do have strange little flashes of Madison tucking me into bed, but I don’t know if those are real memories or if my mind was just playing tricks on me. You never know with me, not when I’m in that fucked-up state.

  But if it was real, I hate that she saw me like that. It’s humiliating, which is as good a reason as any to ignore her.

  “Hey, Sis,” I murmur into Jacey’s blonde hair. “Happy birthday! You smell like spaghetti.”

  She rolls her eyes and lets go of me, turning to Madison.

  “Maddy, you’ve got to come and finally meet my brother.”

  Madison looks stricken, but she manages to put one foot in front of the other, leaving the candy-ass’s side to stand reluctantly in front of me.

  Even though I’m uncomfortable about this myself, I fight the urge to laugh at the distinct expression of discomfort on her gorgeous face. No matter what else she might be feeling, it’s clear she’s not sure how to handle this situation, just as it’s clear that she’s not used to not being in control. She has no idea what to say to me. At all.

  It’s pretty fucking funny.

  “This is my brother Gabriel.” Jacey looks up at me proudly. “He just got back from Afghanistan a few months ago and he’s hardly made the time to come see his poor little sister. Gabriel, this is my friend—and boss—Madison. You’ve heard all about her.”

  Madison’s blue eyes are frozen on me, a question gleaming in them.

  What the fuck?

  I can hear it just as clearly as if she’d said the words. And it makes me wonder again just how much she saw last night. It puts me on the defensive and I smirk, just to prove that none of it matters.

  When Madison sees it, her eyes harden even more.

  Jacey stares from Madison to me.

  “Um. Aren’t you going to say anything? ‘Nice to meet you,’ maybe? What’s wrong with you two? Did I miss something?”

  Madison finally blinks and breaks our gaze, glancing at Jacey.

  “It’s, uh, nice to meet you.” She looks uncertain of what to say next so I clear my throat.

  I don’t see the point in mentioning what happened last night. Or what almost happened. Mentioning any part of it would open a can of worms that I don’t want to discuss.

  Madison looks grateful for a moment before her face closes up and she turns cool once again. For some reason, I’m guessing that’s her normal persona… cool and collected.

  It seems very her.

  Or maybe she’s being cold because she’s mad that I left her at the accident? I internally flinch. I hate that I did that. It was a dick thing to do. But I wasn’t myself. If she’s judging me for that, fuck her. She doesn’t know shit.

  I grin widely to show her that she’s not always in control.

  Because that’s very me.

  “It’s nice to formally meet you, Madison. I’ve heard a lot about you. Some of it was even good.”

  Jacey gasps and punches me, but I ignore her quick protests about how everything was good and how she’d never say anything bad about Madison. I even ignore her whining about how my arm hurt her hand.

  Instead I glance down and notice the way Madison’s chest fills out her snug T-shirt, and I briefly flash back to the way her nipples tasted in my mouth, pink and sweet. My groin tightens and I quickly return my attention to the present as Madison slides her slender hand into mine.

  “It’s a pleasure,” she answers coolly. “And Jacey, don’t worry. I know you only say good things about me. Your brother was just joking, I’m sure.”

  I swallow a snort, but Jacey looks appeased.

  “Sorry, Maddy,” she mutters. “My brother didn’t used to be so rude. He’s still adjusting from being overseas.”

  Anger flashes through me, quick and hot, but I tamp it down. I meant to be a little rude. I can’t get mad for being called out on it.

  “I’m sure I’ll be back to normal soon,” I agree with her smoothly before I change the subject. “Do you have a table for me? We’re gonna need a table for three. Brand’s coming too.”

  Jacey’s face lights up at the mention of our childhood friend.

  “Thank God! I haven’t seen him in at least a month. You both suck at coming to see me. You should be ashamed of yourselves.” She turns to Madison. “Can I give them the window table in the corner?”

  Madison nods.

  “Of course. It was nice to meet you, Gabriel. I hope you enjoy your meal.”

  She abruptly turns and joins a couple at a different table. Not that I’m going to show it, but I’m a little flabbergasted at the change in her. This cool, unflappable woman is nothing like the hot-blooded chick I met last night. I find myself staring at her tight ass for a minute, wondering how such a small ass fits such a big stick in it. I’m chuckling at the thought as Jacey leads me to my table.

  “I’ll bring you a beer,” Jacey tells me as she hands me a menu and eyes the wrapped gift that I set on the table next to me. “What will Brand want?”

  “A beer is fine,” I tell her as I look over the food selection. “Thanks, Sis.”

  She nods as she leaves and I glance around.

  The restaurant is nice, although Madison doesn’t seem like the kind of person who would own a restaurant. At least she didn’t seem that way last night. Today, though, who knows? I think about it for a second, and vaguely remember Jacey telling me that Maddy inherited it from her parents. That would make more sense.

  Turning slightly, I find her in my periphery. Her light blonde hair is easy to find. Whereas last night she was dressed like a runway model, today she’s wearing workout clothes—
tiny tight shorts, a tiny shirt that leaves nothing to the imagination and tennis shoes. It’s strange as fuck. It’s like she’s done a complete about-face.

  So who is the real Madison? The sexy siren who wanted to go home with me last night or this tightly wound business owner?

  Maybe she’s tightly wound during the day and a siren in the sack?

  It seems like something that I should make it my mission to find out.

  She’s sitting with her little group now: a gorgeous dark-haired woman and a muscular tattooed guy. She’s also purposely not looking at me, I can tell. Her shoulders are angled away from me and she’s laughing at everything her companions say, as if to show me what a good time she’s having.

  And no, I’m not egotistical for thinking that her behavior revolves around me. At this moment, her behavior is revolving around me. She’s as acutely aware of where I am in this room as I am of her. Every so often I can see her sneaking sideways glances at me. She’s probably wondering about the real me, just like I’m wondering about the real her. If she saw much of my episode last night, if it was bad, then she’s probably trying to figure me out right this minute.

  Since I can’t remember what happened last night, there’s only one thing I can do.

  Fuck with her.

  Prove to her that I’m not a pussy. Stare at her until she squirms in her seat, as she remembers exactly what we almost did last night, what she begged me to do. Show her that she doesn’t have the upper hand with me just because I can’t remember what I did.

  Grinning to myself, I switch seats so that I’m squarely facing her. And then I pointedly stare at her.

  This should prove entertaining.

  * * *

  Madison

  What the hell?

  My cheeks flush hotly as I feel Gabriel’s stare burning into me from across the room. How in the name of all that is holy did I not notice that his last name was the same as Jacey’s when I looked at his driver’s license last night? That accident must’ve shaken me up even more than I realized. And why the hell is he staring at me? He’s acting like nothing happened last night at all, like he didn’t totally lose his shit. What am I supposed to do with that?

  Even though he’s very obviously trying to draw my attention, there’s no way in hell that I’m going to acknowledge it. I’d rather die before I give him the satisfaction of looking at him. Instead I concentrate even more on appearing like I’m having one hell of a good time.

  I pick up my wineglass and take another sip, before I smile broadly at my brother-in-law.

  “So, how do you like working for your grandpa? How often are you going to have to go to Hartford this summer?”

  Pax pauses mid-bite and thinks about my question. As he does, he absently rubs my sister’s back with his free hand.

  “At first I wondered what the hell I’d gotten myself into. There was no way I wanted to be surrounded by suits and ties every day. But then I settled in and found my place. I don’t have to wear a suit and tie because I own the fucking company. I’m still proving myself to my grandpa, but I think I’m gonna like it.”

  “Good,” I answer. “But I’m not going to like it when you guys move away.”

  Mila rolls her eyes. “Mad, we’ve been through this a hundred times. It’s a two-hour plane ride. You can come see me and I’ll come see you. It’s not like we’re never going to see each other again. And hopefully you’ll be dating someone soon, so that will distract you. We’ve gotta figure out something to do with your personal life.”

  I raise an eyebrow. “Oh, we do, huh? You’re going to have input on that?”

  Mila laughs and pats Pax’s leg. “I’m good at relationships, apparently. I can help you with yours.”

  “I don’t have a relationship,” I remind her. “That was your whole point.”

  She rolls her eyes again.

  “Fine. We’re going to start with an easy one. Ethan Eldridge. I know for a fact that he’s single. I bumped into his mom at the library the other day. She said he’s been lonely because a lot of his old friends have moved away. So there you go. You can start by dating Ethan. He’ll be good practice.”

  I hold up a spoon. “And it doesn’t matter to you that this spoon has more of a personality than he does?”

  Pax bursts out laughing, looking over at Ethan before he glances at his wife.

  “She has a point. Madison needs someone who can give her a run for her money. That guy… er, he doesn’t seem quite up to it.”

  Mila gives her husband a skeptical look. “Maybe. But Maddy has always picked guys that are too overbearing, too controlling. And then it ends in a disaster and Maddy’s pissed off at the world and at the male species in general. Maybe she needs to try out a guy like Ethan.”

  We all glance discreetly in Ethan’s direction, to find him scrolling quietly through his cell phone. He’s wearing a preppy watch, a preppy shirt, perfectly fitted khakis. He’s so neat and tidy that even his nails are buffed and cut to a neat square. Very neutral, very bland and vanilla.

  Bland and vanilla just aren’t me.

  Pax turns back around, shaking his head. “I don’t think he’s got it in him to handle Maddy.”

  I raise my eyebrows. “He can’t handle me?”

  Pax quickly backtracks. “That’s not exactly what I meant. You’re… shall we say… a little fierce. You need a guy with balls. You don’t need a guy whose balls are in your purse. Just sayin’.”

  “Ha, so says the guy whose balls are in Mila’s handbag as we speak.”

  Mila laughs as I give Pax an icy stare. He ignores it and my comment, while he chews on a piece of bread, totally unaffected by my glare or my accusation that my sister owns his testicles. I guess he’s secure enough in his manhood to not care.

  Turning my head slightly, I can see Gabriel’s dark shape from the corner of my eye and I almost flush again.

  Throughout this entire conversation, his smoldering stare has burned holes into me. It’s so potent that it almost feels like it’s actually touching me. Finally I’m unable to resist and I glance at him.

  He stares back at me, his eyes stormy and dark.

  What the hell is he thinking? Is he remembering the accident? Or is he remembering how scorchingly hot last night was before the accident? I stare at his mouth and I can’t help but remember how it tasted last night before his meltdown.

  Smoky, minty… like a man. I gulp.

  And then I die. Because with his gaze still connected to mine, he very purposefully slips his finger into his mouth, then pulls it out slowly, sucking it.

  Just like he sucked the taste of me off his fingers last night.

  Oh. My. God.

  My cheeks explode into flame and his dark, dark eyes glimmer with amusement. I stare at him as I realize that he’s fucking with me. He’s purposely trying to remind me of last night.

  The corner of his lip twitches and I know.

  I know that he thinks he won whatever little game he’s been playing.

  Eff him. Willing the color to drain away from my face, I give Gabriel my iciest stare, lift my nose into the air and turn back around to find Mila watching the interaction.

  “Who’s that?” she asks with extreme interest. I shrug.

  “Jacey’s brother. I just met him.”

  Mila raises her eyebrow. “You just met him?” She stares at me. “That seems doubtful. You keep staring at each other. You know him. Spill.”

  I scowl at my sister. “Why do you have to know me so well? I met him last night at a club in Chicago.”

  Mila chokes on her drink of water. “Seriously? You met him at a club?”

  And without any shame at all, she spins around in her seat to stare at him.

  Gabriel stares back at her with interest, then cocks an eyebrow at me. He’s sprawled out in his seat, his long legs casually relaxed. None of this is affecting him in the same way it is affecting me. It’s like he doesn’t care that what happened last night was disconcerting as hell. That pis
ses me off.

  “Turn around,” I hiss at Mila, yanking on her arm. “God. Do you have to be so obvious?”

  “I can’t help it,” she says, without turning around. “How can I not look at the guy who has you all worked up?”

  “I am not worked up,” I answer between my teeth, tugging on her arm harder. “Don’t make me manhandle a pregnant woman because then Pax will kill me. Just turn around. God.”

  She finally does as I ask, but she looks at me strangely. “What the hell, Maddy? Why are you so upset? It’s just Jacey’s brother, right?”

  There is a knowingness to her tone that makes me want to smack my sister, even if she is pregnant.

  “Yes,” I answer firmly, ignoring her tone and resisting my urge to inflict bodily harm. “He’s just Jacey’s brother.”

  “Well, in that case, I should go introduce myself. I mean, Jacey is our employee. It’s only polite.”

  And with that, Mila is out of her seat and across the room before I can stop her. She moves surprisingly fast for a pregnant girl. I’m left staring with my mouth open. Pax reaches over and snaps it closed.

  “She got you, Mad.”

  I look at him. “Pax, I swear to God. One of these days I’m going to kill her. It’s gonna happen.”

  Pax just laughs, entirely unconcerned.

  “Whatever. If you were going to kill her, you would have done it a long time ago. But you didn’t. Instead you protected her like a mama bear. So I have a hard time believing that you would ever harm a hair on her head. And now I’ve gotta go take a piss. Can you behave yourself out here alone? And by that, I mean can you stay out here without killing anyone?”

  I shake my head and follow him.

  “I’m not staying out here,” I mutter when he looks back at me in surprise.

  “Well, you’re not coming with me,” he grins. “It’s big, but I can hold it myself.”

  It takes me half a second to realize what he meant, and what it is. I feel myself blush in spite of myself.

  “God, I’m surrounded by imbeciles.”

  I roll my eyes one more time for good measure, then stalk back to my office. I can hear my brother-in-law laughing as I go, just as I can feel Gabriel’s dark gaze tracking every move I make. It’s freaking unnerving and I’m pissed at myself that I let him get to me like this.